What Makes a 'Man'

What makes a Man?

I really feel for men. I do. Society is very hard on men. It sends them subliminal messages that they have to dominate, control, win...be the best, have the best. Male society typically rests the "quality" of a man on his possessions: how much money does he make, does he have a beautiful wife or girlfriend, how many homes does he own? So on and so forth...

I saw a commercial the other day.
I forget what the commercial was for, but it played during the football game. (obviously geared/targeted towards men). In the commercial, (lets just say for arguments sake it was Axe), they showed a guy in therapy. But, the therapist was a football coach. The guy was like "I think yellow makes me sad because..."
And the coach / "therapist" was like "You wanna get tough? Forget all these feelings!! While you're off in namby-pamby land, I'll be using this Axe deoderant to get chicks!"

((Or something like that...you get the idea. ))

First of all...No. 
Going to therapy does not make you a sissy, a wimp, or a wuss.
Also, there is this notion that all you do in therapy is "talk about your feelings". Well, number one...that's not true. And two...even if it was, so what??!
We do not get to talk about our feelings at our job. We don't get to talk about our feelings with our boss, our co-workers, most of our friends (especially if you're a man!!), even our girlfriends...so many of them are busy riding us about how much money we're making, and whether or not we took the trash out.

So, understandably...men shove their feelings down. They have to provide, win, compete, achieve.
Then, we girls expect them to want to share their feelings with us and tell us how they feel.

To some degree, this is warranted. I am very verbal, and I express my feelings fairly well, for the most part. To a large degree, I was raised like a boy. I was forced to work, told to achieve, and very rarely got to "just have fun". So, a lot of people in the 'real world' began telling me that I had 'trouble with communicating'.

We all have trouble communicating. Communication is inherently flawed.
But, I will say...that therapy makes a person way better at it. By talking about feelings, repressed memories, whatever...you're learning to identify what the feeling was, why it made you feel that way, and why it was ok to feel the way you did. There is no right or wrong. It is a process of learning who and what you are. It is a process of acceptance, and ultimate self-love.

So many chicks walk around with this attitude like, "I ain't f*ckin' with no man, I'm working on me!!".
Well...then, work. Do real work. Don't just say you're gonna do it, actually step up, have some balls, and do it. This does not include getting wasted, partying with your girls, and having one night stands.

And you men...do the same. Stop expecting to find the "one" when you have not found yourself.

It takes strength to admit weakness. It takes the ability to surrender to finally become the captain.